How To Support A Loved One

From a counseling perspective, those who are struggling can use all the support they can get. ‘How do I support my loved one who is struggling?’ you may ask? There are many ways that you can support the support and maintain motivation by focusing on encouragement, autonomy, and emotional support. Here are some key ways to help:

1. Encourage Autonomy – Support your loved one’s ability to make decisions and take responsibility for their own life. Motivation often flourishes when individuals feel a sense of ownership over their goals.

2. Provide Emotional Support – Let your loved one know you believe in them and are there for them, but avoid excessive pressure or unsolicited advice.

3. Help Them Identify Their "Why" – Motivation is strongest when connected to meaningful personal values and goals. Encouraging open-ended discussions about what excites or interests them can help.

4. Offer Positive Reinforcement – Acknowledge your loved one’s efforts and progress, even if they are small. Feeling recognized can fuel continued effort.

5. Model Healthy Motivation – If you demonstrate perseverance, goal-setting, and a positive attitude in your own life, your loved one may be more likely to adopt similar behaviors.

6. Respect His Process – Everyone’s motivation ebbs and flows. Instead of pushing, help them develop habits that build consistency over time.

7. Address Underlying Barriers – If your loved one seems persistently unmotivated, they may be struggling with anxiety, depression, or other obstacles. Encouraging open conversations about thier well-being can be helpful.

8. Encourage Growth Mindset – Help them see challenges as opportunities to learn rather than failures.

9. Avoid Micromanaging or Rescuing – While it's natural to want to help, stepping in too much can sometimes reduce motivation by removing the need for personal effort.

Contact Bee Blissful if you would like suggestions tailored to a specific situation.

Identifying Emotional Needs

Learning how to identify needs requires self-reflection on what you truly want and need in relationships. Before you can express emotional needs, you first need to understand what they are. This involves self-reflection and awareness-building.

1. Recognizing Emotional Needs

Reflect on what you truly need in relationships and personal life. Some common emotional needs include:

• Feeling heard and understood

• Emotional support and validation

• Respect for personal space and boundaries

• Consistency and reliability

• Affection and connection

• Independence and autonomy

Journal or list needs in different areas of life (romantic, family, friendships, work).

2. Identifying Unmet Needs

Think about situations where you felt upset, frustrated, or emotionally drained. These moments often highlight unmet needs.

• Example: “I felt resentful when he dismissed my feelings—maybe I need more validation.”

• Example: “I feel exhausted when I have to take care of everything alone—maybe I need more support.”

3. Checking for Patterns

Reflect on whether certain needs consistently go unmet.

• Are there recurring issues in relationships?

• Do you tend to prioritize others’ needs over your own?

• Are you afraid to ask for what you need?

4. Putting It Into Words

Once you’ve identified your needs, you can practice stating them clearly.

• Instead of: "You never listen to me!"

• Try: "I feel unheard when I talk about my feelings, and I need to feel understood."

This first step sets the foundation for Step 2: Learning How to Communicate These Needs Effectively.

Contact Bee Blissful if you’re interested in Step 2.